Allison Pearson: Sparing the rod has spoilt these teachers

How about a harsh lesson for those teachers who act as if naughty children didn't exist?

A school in Lancashire has banned naughty children. No, that’s not quite right. Ignoring several centuries of compelling evidence, Barrowford Primary says there is no such thing as a naughty child, there is only “unconditional positive regard”.

The headteacher Rachel Tomlinson says: “We don’t label children naughty at all. It’s important they see themselves as intrinsically good and build up a positive sense of self.”

Teachers at Barrowford are not allowed to raise their voices, because it is “not respectful”. Faced with a wayward mixed infant causing havoc in a lesson, they must say something like: “You are having an impact on my emotional wellbeing.”

You can see how well that would work with Damian of 3B after he has liberated the class gerbils, can’t you? “I didn’t get told off or nothing, but Mr Dixon says I was damaging his self-esteem. LOL!”

Teachers can send a naughty – oops, slightly less adorable than usual – child to another classroom, but to avoid causing “humiliation” they are told to use the phrase: “You know I think you are wonderful, but your mistaken behaviour shows me that it would be best for you to have some time here, where these children can help you to stop making that mistake.” Yeah, right.

As for Barrowfield’s young pupils, not for them a jeered playground insult, a kicked shin or the time-honoured tactic of pulling a girl’s ponytail and running away. In this educational Utopia, a furious eight-year-old is taught to say: “You’ve emptied my resilience bucket.”

_{Sir, he's emptied my resilience bucket...}

Let’s pause for a moment and picture the global applications ofunconditional positive regard. “Dear Mr Hitler, you have emptied our resilience bucket. Please give Poland back or you will have a serious emotional impact on our wellbeing. Love, Britain.”

Rachel Tomlinson admits that her sanction-free approach is “extreme” but insists that it’s good for the children.

Is it really? I am all for small people being told that there is more to life than exam results and that each of them is special. I agree with encouraging a disruptive kid to make a better choice, rather than crushing him. But the trouble with the non-judgmental approach is that so often it lacks judgment. Ofsted rated Barrowford Primary “good”, but noted that bullying is not dealt with effectively. Even if a child is harmed at the school, there is no punishment but a “restorative conference”, designed to “heal the damaged relationship”.

Trust me, I know all about those. My daughter was badly bullied at junior school. The offender – let’s call her Little Cow – was summoned to the head’s office and asked to write a list of the hateful things she had done to my girl.

The piece of paper was then handed solemnly to my daughter who was given the “choice” of tearing it up and putting the pieces into the bin to show that all the unpleasantness was in the past. This she duly did.

• Are some children born naughty?

• The 'clueless narcissists' damaging our children

Back outside in the asphalt jungle, my daughter’s bully resumed her cruel campaign, with sly modifications to avoid detection. Far from punishing the bully, the school bent over backwards to build up *her* self-esteem. As long as I live, I will never forget (or forgive) the day the name of my daughter’s bully was read out at the annual school prize-giving. She won – wait for it – Best All Round Contribution to School Life.

“Best All-Round Contribution to School Fear and Misery more like,” muttered the mother sitting next to me.

I have seen the dark side of unconditional positive regard and, frankly, it stinks. Poor Lancashire. Schools that lack sanctions are not an earthly Paradise, they are Lord of the Flies plus mobiles and rain.

One more thought. What does Barrowford Primary have instead of a naughty step? A reconsideration plinth?